Sacred self care Love Academy



to More Fulfilling Love Relationships for Women

Part 1


The Undeniable Truth

In my transformational personal growth work with thousands of women from coast to coast, no matter what strategies or techniques we might attempt to use, or what paths we’ve tried to take to get us there, I’ve found that we keep coming back to this particular profound truth:  sacred self-care is the foundation upon which a woman’s love relationship with herself is built. It is the very basis of her having an inner experience of joy and authentic self-love.


The Critical Link

Sacred self-care is critical to the foundation of a woman’s life.  So much so that being able to experience deep satisfaction and fulfillment in her love relationships (and her current or future marriage) hinges on its presence.  And satisfaction and fulfillment will manage to continue eluding her if sacred self-care is not real in her life.


The Effect of the Female Love Lies

In our traditional (but flawed and failing) love relationships paradigm, the focus tends to be on the man as the object and the centerpiece of our attention, instead of first, on our relationship with self, and our own level of self-love.  This is a dangerous oversight. And it has created disastrous results in our love relationships and marriages, including the highest divorce rate in the world.

This is one of the key relationship myths or lies directed particularly at women, one of the female Love Lies, that The Love Academy, my live relationships course, exposes.


The female Love Lies are a specific set of faulty, flawed relationship beliefs we’ve had “installed” and instilled starting at the young age of three – yes age three!  One particular female Love Lie, Love Lie #4, tells us that “Self-Love is Optional.” However, this lie has us disregard the importance and impact of our relationship with self, and its profound effect on our ability to love another, on our ability to give love and receive love, and most importantly, to know how love does and doesn’t operate.


The Power of High-Level Self-Love

I’ve found that a woman cannot and will not be able to have an outer experience of fulfillment in her love relationships (and marriage) if a high level of self-love is not in place.  And how does a high level of self-love get “in place” for a woman?  It comes right back around to sacred self-care, which serves as both a path to and also an expression of self-love.


Sacred self-care is more than just about doing certain things, grooming, working out, or being good to yourself. As I share in all of my books, including my newest book, The Love Lies, sacred self-care is a way of relating to oneself that is 1) grounded in being a responsible caretaker and wise guardian of your own body and being, first, 2) and valuing and honoring what nourishes, fortifies and renews your own mind, body, spirit and energy, before attempting to take care of others and give to or do for others.


Sacred self-care shows up in self-honoring decisions and choices; how you see yourself and your body, how you relate to others, how you manage your energy, and moving through your life from a place of high self-value. One of the commitments of a sacred self-caring woman is to maintain a state of inner joy and peace, being healed and free, and being self-expressed.  A sacred self-caring woman has a JUICY life!


Tend to Your Primary Love Relationship First

My 20+ years of transformational work with women has confirmed: without an inner experience of high-level authentic self-love in your primary human relationship first – the one with self – it is not possible (contrary to popular belief and talk show rhetoric) to have an experience of deep satisfaction in a romantic relationship (or marriage) with a man.  This is why my full day Love relationships intensive, The Love Academy transcends your “relationship status” and is for both single and married women.  The outer experience in our love relationship or marriage will continue to be a reflection of the lack within, and yield dissatisfaction. (For more details on the upcoming Love Academy 101, click here: )


This particular female Love Lie is one of many at the ROOT of so many of our relationship ills and challenges. It is “square one.”  We start with this “square” and move on to 3 others in the course – ones that are empowering and liberating.


This is why there is such a widespread phenomenon in our relationships and marriages of:

  • Disappointment
  • Frustration
  • Period of happiness, but not on-oing joy
  • Irritation
  • A yearning and a longing for MORE….in our love relationships and marriages


The absence of sacred self-care and a high-level of self-love is unhealthy for both women and men because it keeps us looking to a man to be the compensation for what we perceive as missing within, or for what we haven’t taken responsibility for cultivating within ourselves.


When sacred self-care is absent and high-level self-love is lacking, we look to a man to “fill the holes” we feel in our spirits. We unknowingly reduce him to being a hole-filler and our “completer.” It is time to put an end to this old, failed paradigm and step into a NEW one, based upon the empowering female Love Truths.


The Good News

The good news is that a NEW relationships paradigm is here – one that is not based upon the female Love Lies but is based on a liberating set of Love Truths.  And The Love Academy 101, for single and married women, is the place to learn about it. It is unlike ANY other existing relationships course available – and participants are producing amazing results.


You are Invited….

YOU are invited to experience the live Love Academy course, and to be introduced to the NEW paradigm that is setting women free from coast to coast. Come and find out what all the buzz is about…. at least 25 NEW marriages and counting; a host of renewed and transformed marriages; and single women learning how to court, according to Debrena’s Modern Courtship Principles, and more.


For details on the upcoming East Coast Love Academy taking place on Saturday, June 4, click  here:  Yes, I want more Info on the Love Academy!!


Stay tuned for Part 2 and Part 3!


With Love,

Debrena Jackson Gandy

Your Relationships Readiness and Detox Coach

and Founder of The Love Academy